DEATH IS EASY by Russell Madden

FREEDOM,  As If It Mattered by Russell Madden

The Guardian Project by Russell Madden

RaNdoM by Russell Madden

 

The summer sky stretched above Jaimie like an inverted ocean of deepest blue. Herds of puffy clouds floated in brilliant whiteness across that waveless expanse. Happily they welcomed the slowly rising, golden globe of the morning sun.

Chirping bluebirds and stately robins dressed in their finest red-vested attire pranced in the tree branches above Jaimie's head or swooped through the crisp air in acrobatic feats of derring-do.

From his wooden seat on the pine-green park bench, Jaimie watched the intricate aerial dances of his birdy companions. Despite the joyous abandon of their flighty play, however, the boy did not smile.

Carefully Jaimie shifted his gaze towards the other people who shared the grounds of City Park on this beautiful Saturday. Hand-in-hand, men and women strolled slowly along the curving sidewalks, talking and laughing in the way that grown-ups do.

A blonde-haired girl squealed at a pinch from her younger brother and tore out after him across the glistening grass. Her angry shouts mingled with his giggling shrieks of mock terror and then faded into the distance.

But Jaimie did not smile even at this. He was not happy, not happy, at all. Even the chocolate bar he slowly unwrapped and consumed piece by crumbly piece did not lighten his mood.

No, Jaimie was determined not to be happy, not to smile, not even to grin ju-u-ust a little.

Shyly, he turned his body until he could see the source of his gloomy pondering.

There they were...in bright red and blue, startling yellow and green. Some shimmered in gold and silver splendor. Others peeked out striped and swirled and oh-so-beautiful.

A shuddery sigh escaped Jaimie. The balloons practically pulled him across the width of the sidewalk. In a friendly crowd next to the street vendor, they bobbed and bounced and jounced in a joyous, beckoning welcome.

A little red-headed boy -- even younger then Jaimie -- skidded to a halt beside the eagerly excited balloons. Jaimie could not hear what the hopping boy said to his mother and father, but a moment later the lucky boy clapped his hands and reached upward. The red-and-green plaid sleeve of his flannel shirt slid down his thin arm. With only a brief hesitation, the boy selected his very own personal balloon.

When Jaimie saw the treasure, he nearly slid from his seat in the intensity of his desire and admiration. The balloon seemed to puff out in pride at its place of honor. Bright yellow stripes ran from its curving top to its pointed bottom. In the clear spaces between the stripes sparkled silver and blue, five-pointed stars.

Jaimie gasped. The most amazing thing of all, however, was the second, green and white balloon which nestled inside the first!

Now Jaimie felt not only not happy, he was truly sad. This unknown boy had two balloons while Jaimie had none. It was not fair. Not fair, at all.

Tears trembled in the corners of Jaimie's brown eyes. Rapidly he blinked them away. Sadness sat like a weight upon his shoulders. He wanted a balloon so very badly, but he had no money left. None.

The day before, his parents had brought him to the park for the Summer's End carnival. For the first time since leaving the city for their new jobs, they had been relaxed and not so grouchy. They even doubled his allowance for the week because he had been so helpful. He had not whined or complained all week.

Well...at least not much.

Wistfully Jaimie watched the boy and his parents as they headed towards the carnival rides crowded together in one corner of the park. He knew how much fun they would have. He had spent over half his money there yesterday.

Sharing the view of the birds who dove and rose above him, he had swirled into the sky on the spinning Ferris wheel. Bravely he had ridden the wild-maned black stallion on the merry-go-round. Then he had tested his courage and skill piloting a rusty plane determinedly chasing the tail of its target.

Next, of course, he had no choice but to bury his face in a pink halo of sticky, scrumptious cotton-candy. In his other hand, he clutched a green and red and blue sno-cone. Its coldly sweet mound of ice vanished in great gulps of thirsty excitement.

Hurrying ahead of his parents, he skidded to a halt when he spied the balloon vendor and his wondrous wares. The balloons shone like none he had ever seen. Straining on their strings, they leaned towards him, whispering among themselves as they rudely jostled each other in their attempts to attract his attention.

Reaching into the pockets of his faded blue jeans for his money, Jaimie discovered with horror that he had only a single, tarnished dime left. Frantically, he appealed to his parents. They refused to give him any more money. "Rules," they had said. Rules! Adults always had rules. They simply did not understand...

So Jaimie had spent all that evening and night dreaming about those incredible balloons. He just knew that if he had one, he would keep it for ever and always. He would hold it and talk to it and share his world with it. He would never, ever ask for anything else again. Never.

But here he sat as the day melted away from him as surely as had the candy bar he had sneaked from the kitchen cupboard that morning. Tomorrow the balloons would be gone and so would his last chance at happiness.

With a heavy sigh, Jaimie jumped from the splintery old park bench. Jamming his hands into his empty pockets, he headed away from the vendor and those tantalizing, unattainable balloons.

He didn't know where he was going. He didn't care. As long as it was away from what he desired but could not have.

Aimlessly he walked. And walked. And walked. The sun warmed his back and his slumped shoulders. His legs grew tired, but he didn't care about that, either. He walked some more.

When he passed a water fountain, he slowed his pace. He had had nothing to drink since leaving home. While he didn't want anything to spoil his bad mood, a little water would be O.K. Wouldn't it?

Stretching up on his toes, he leaned over and pushed the plastic lever on the fountain. Instantly, a stream of cool water arced up and out in front of him. Merrily it splashed and gurgled as it spun down the drain.

Gratefully, Jaimie lowered his lips into that liquid refreshment. It tasted so good. In its own way, it satisfied him as nicely as that chocolate bar he had consumed so long ago.

Something brushed him lightly on the arm with a touch as delicate and shy as a new-born butterfly. Turning his head slightly to the side, Jaimie slid his eyes to see who -- or what -- intruded on his special moment.

Abruptly, his jaw dropped, the gushing water forgotten in an instant. The feather-light tap had come from no butterfly or, indeed, an insect of any kind. No adult or child stood there awaiting their turn.

It was a balloon.

A balloon!

Jaimie's first impulse urged him to jump and shout for joy. Something held him back. The shiny, deep-blue surface of the balloon trembled in timid doubt as it hung face-to-face with him. The long white string trailing from its bottom quivered and shook like the tail of a lonely puppy.

Carefully Jaimie extended his right hand. He stopped when the balloon suddenly shied away, fearful of what he might intend to do.

"Easy, Billy," Jaimie said softly, reassuringly. Yes, he thought, you look like a Billy to me. "Don't be afraid. I won't hurt you."

Hesitantly, Billy nudged forward, closing the distance between them. When the cool plastic of his skin met Jaimie's finger, Billy jerked back. Seeing that the boy threatened no harm, he edged nearer to caress the tanned skin of his new-found friend.

Slowly Jaimie reached up to stroke Billy's resilient body. He moved as gingerly as he did when handling one of his mother's expensive china dishes.

"Are you lost, Billy?" Jaimie asked fearfully. What if some other boy or girl rushed up to snatch Billy away from him?

For answer, Billy snuggled closer and squeaked in rubbery reassurance.

Jaimie's mouth curved into an achingly wide smile. No matter where he had come from before, Billy was his now. Wherever Jaimie went, there Billy would go, as well.

Smoothly Billy rose until the string attached to his tail slid into Jaimie's waiting palm.

Playfully Jaimie pulled on the string. Billy bobbed in good-natured enthusiasm and bopped Jaimie on the head in a teasing game of tag. Jaimie laughed and pranced down the sidewalk with Billy chasing him every inch of the way.

Sad no more, Jaimie wandered about the park. Contented despite his penniless pockets, he watched the kids and adults swarming over the carnival rides.

The miniature train tooted its tinny horn before chugging away with its passengers on their circular route. Children and their parents shouted and yelled on the red Tilt-a-Whirl. Teenagers swung on swings or cuddled quietly on secluded benches, hands clutching and heads lowered together.

White-haired grandfathers tossed gold and silver painted horseshoes into the sky. The target stakes rattled with loud clanks at each ringer.

Families sat chattering around laden picnic tables consuming steaming corn on the cob, sizzling hotdogs and hamburgers, and crisp watermelon and luscious ice cream.

Jaimie and Billy shared it all with each other: every sight, every sound, every smell. As the minutes sped by, the bond between them grew and deepened.

Jaimie told Billy how much different his life was now. In the city, he would never have dared wander around without an adult close by. Here, he could come and go as he pleased, and his parents never worried about him...most of the time, anyway.

Here, he had parks to play in, streets where he could ride the shiny new blue bicycle he had received for his birthday, and a video arcade where he could spend his spare quarters (few though they were).

Yes, he told Billy, this town had many things he had never experienced in the city. Yet some feelings were not so nice.

Like loneliness.

His parents confidently told him he would make new friends once school started. But what if all the kids there hated him? Or thought he was weird? What if the teachers failed him? What would he do if no one wanted to be his pal?

Desperately Jaimie hugged Billy closer. No matter what happened, though, he had one new friend who listened, who cared, who liked him despite the fact that he had never before lived in a place where people left their houses and cars unlocked.

Tired from all the excitement and exercise, Jaimie sank onto the sloping, grassy shore of the duck pond which occupied the center of City Park. Crossing his legs and hugging his knees, he gazed out across the wind-ruffled surface of the pond. Green-and-brown feathered ducks sailed there in serene formation like miniature battleships.

The midday sun baked Jaimie's body. Drowsily he blinked and yawned until his tonsils showed. The day's events were catching up to him. Like a big tabby cat, he stretched and lay down. The cool, green grass tickled his cheek.

As he floated into slumber, he snuggled closer to Billy.

"I love you, Billy," he mumbled as he curled into a ball. "We'll always be together."

Peaceful and contented, Jaimie slept. When a frolicking breeze began to blow, he did not feel it. When his fingers relaxed on Billy's string, he did not know it. When Billy drifted away in the stiffening breeze, he did not see it.

But a tiny voice deep down in Jaimie realized that something was wrong. Jerking awake as he did when bad dreams assaulted him at night, he snapped open his eyes and sat up.

Muzzy headed and disoriented, for a moment he wondered where he was and how he had gotten there. The sight of Billy sailing across the surface of the pond jolted him to action.

"Billy!" Jaimie screamed. "Come back."

But the breeze had become a wind, and Billy could do no more than struggle in the grip of the invisible hand that had seized him.

Frantically Jaimie ran around the wide curve of the pond. The distance between him and his friend grew, but he could do nothing about it.

"Stupid pond!" Jaimie shouted as he gasped for breath. If Billy had bobbed away across a field, he would have had a chance of catching hold of that trailing white string. Unfortunately, the water stood obstinately in the way.

"Don't go, Billy!" As fast as he could, Jaimie sped towards the opposite side of the pond. If only he could run on water....

No use: Billy weaved from side to side yet still soared higher and farther away with each passing second.

A half-buried rock stubbed Jaimie's right toe. Yelling in surprise, he stumbled, flailing wildly, and plowed face first into the hard ground. When he looked up again, Billy was gone.

Stunned, Jaimie could only stare at the deep blue expanse that had swallowed his friend. Nothing met his gaze except endless sky. Even the clouds had vanished into whatever realm they called home.

Pale green streaks stained Jaimie's palms and left cheek. A tiny trickle of blood dripped from a finger he had scratched on some hidden stone.

His scrapes and bruises, however, did not penetrate to his awareness. He wanted to cry, but not from any physical cause. His agony choked his breath, and pain twisted his stomach into queasy knots, but neither were connected to his injuries.

Billy. Was. Gone.

He would never see Billy again. He would never again hold him. Or whisper secrets shared only by them. Or...anything, ever again.

Then Jaimie did begin to cry, but quietly. His sobs shook his slumped shoulders and reddened his eyes. He cried for a long time. Eventually he stopped.

Feeling like an old man, he stood and, with lowered head, began to trudge in the direction of home. The sun still shone, the birds still chirped and sang, kids and adults still enjoyed the summery Saturday. But Jaimie no longer cared. He no longer cared about anything.

Listlessly, he sagged onto a park bench. He could not even summon up enough energy to walk home. Nothing awaited him there, anyway.

Minutes passed before he noticed he was not alone. Warily he slid his gaze to the left. His heart jumped in astonishment at what he saw.

A green and yellow swirled balloon hovered at the far end of the bench. Jaimie eyed it suspiciously. Someone had probably tied it there and would return at any moment.

Yet as time passed, no one reclaimed their prize. The balloon squeaked a greeting, but Jaimie ignored it. He didn't care if he never saw a balloon again...even if this one was particularly pretty and lively.

The green and yellow stripes spiralled around the skin of the balloon. They appeared to move as the balloon spun in the diminished breeze. Jaimie thought that was neat. Still, he refused to speak or acknowledge the balloon's presence.

From the corner of his eye, however, he saw the string tying the balloon to the back of the bench unravelling. Slowly, sadly, dejectedly the balloon rose into the air.

In a blur of motion, Jaimie lunged and snatched the wavering string. The balloon eased to a halt and squeaked an hello.

"I'm just doing this," Jaimie said sternly, "until we can find your friend. I'm sure he's just forgotten where you are."

The balloon tried to rub against Jaimie's cheek, but Jaimie roughly shoved it away and said severely, "I won't be your friend! I don't want to do that again. We'll just walk around the park. Someone is bound to recognize you."

So Jaimie and the nameless balloon set out to explore the park. The balloon remained quiet and at a respectful distance. Jaimie started to feel guilty at the way he had snapped at his unwanted companion. To apologize without actually apologizing, he told the balloon a bit about himself and what he had done.

He never mentioned Billy, however.

As the boy and the balloon meandered among the carnival rides, Jaimie head a loud "pop." An instant later, a little girl's screeching wail split the air. Her mother hugged her and tried to comfort her, but nothing helped. The crying went on for a long time.

Stone still, Jaimie watched the drama unfolding before him. At last, he glanced at the green and yellow balloon and then at the girl.

Abruptly he stepped closer and thrust out his hand. "Here," he said harshly. "Be his friend."

Startled into quiet shyness, the girl sniffled and looked wide-eyed at the balloon. Her red-eyed gaze shot towards Jaimie and then her mother. The woman shrugged and smiled. A puzzled expression crept onto her face. She nodded.

Without further hesitation, the girl reached out and wrapped her tiny fingers tightly around the string.

Wordlessly, Jaimie hurried away. He glanced back once. The girl was beaming a smile and laughing. Jaimie could not help himself: a hint of a grin touched his lips.

For some reason, his step felt much lighter than before. He also no longer wanted to return home. Throughout the rest of the afternoon he kept his eyes opened for lone balloons.

He spotted them in the most unexpected places. A purple one cowered in a row of bushes until he coaxed it into the open. Jaimie soothed its fear and finally introduced it to a boy sitting alone in a sandbox playing without energy.

The boy immediately grew animated and talkative once he had a friend of his own to swap secrets with. As Jaimie skipped away, the boy began building a sandcastle in earnest.

Briefly Jaimie enjoyed the company of a red balloon he found caught under the ceiling of a picnic shelter. When he realized it wanted most of all to soar free, Jaimie launched it into the sky with a gleeful shout. There it gyrated in a wild dance and waggled its long string-tail in gratitude to the boy who had helped it achieve its deepest desire.

By the time the trees commenced to cradle the setting sun, Jaimie felt at peace with himself and the day. Though he had looked for Billy and even once thought he spied his friend bounding across the softball field, the balloon turned out instead to belong to a blonde, pigtailed girl. The girl pursued the balloon in mad abandon and rescued it from death on the spikes of the metal fence surrounding the wading pool.

Tired and savoring the mild pangs of loneliness he felt at the loss of Billy, Jaimie headed for home.

The street lights were just flickering on as he came to the two-story beige house that was slowly starting to feel like home. Exhaling a deep breath, he opened and closed the front door.

"I'm home!" he shouted as he went up the stairs towards his bedroom.

"Jaimie," his father called from the living room. "Would you come in here, please."

Uh-oh, Jaimie thought. Were his parents going to yell at him because he had been gone so long? Or had they discovered the missing candy bar he had snitched that morning?

Dragging his feet, Jaimie entered the brightly lit living room. His mom and dad sat on the couch, holding hands. But instead of stormy expressions, they had sly grins on their faces.

Frowning slightly, Jaimie headed towards them. Suddenly he froze in mid-step. How could he have missed such a visitor?

Tied to the floor lamp and tugging impatiently in his direction was an oval, silver-skinned balloon decorated with pictures of spaceships and stars.

"We know how much you wanted a balloon yesterday," his mom said. "Your father and I decided to buy this one for you as a kind of end-of-summer present."

"We hope you like it," his dad said.

Jaimie nodded mutely and went to claim his new friend. Stroking its crinkly skin, he laughed. Charley sounded right. His name was Charley.

Releasing Charley, Jaimie glanced at his parents. They nodded and smiled. Jaimie grinned and dashed from the room.

Charley wasn't Billy, he thought. They didn't even look the same. That was O.K., though. Charley was a new friend, a different friend, a special friend in his own right. Just like all the other balloons he had met that day. Each possessed its own unique qualities.

Whether he knew them for minutes or hours, his balloon friends had brought him joy, at least for awhile. True, some had brought him sadness, as well, yet that was fine. The tears helped him appreciate all the more the laughter he shared with the others.

Hopping onto his bed, he marvelled at the way the lights gleamed off Charley's gloriously different skin. He hoped he would have Charley as a companion for a long time to come. Still, he would never cling to his string as fearfully and tightly as he had to Billy's.

Whatever time he had Charley had together would be enough. Jaimie knew it would be, because anything was better than never having known him, at all.